Ironman UK Training Weeks 3, 4 and 5


In Which I Battle The Weather And An Illness

Week 3

This week was quite a good week. Stuck to my training plan close enough as I was still on holiday for the first half of the week. Went back to work on the Friday for a 12 hour shift then ran an hour afterwards.

On the Saturday I worked 12 hours, then ran for 45 mins. I’m a security guard in a shopping centre so on my feet for nearly all the day, so very chuffed I still ran afterwards.

Sunday, however, was different. Sunday was a cycle day. Sunday was only a 7 hour shift day. Sundays weather was like a tornado.

I rode to work in the morning (3.4mile downhill) and then after work I planned on an hour and 45 cycle. I didn’t plan on the wind and rain however, and I took a battering. The wind seemed to be in my face the entire way (out AND back) and I was drenched. This was my first proper outside ride of the year, and it did me in. I turned back earlier than planned as I was drained, and a mile from home I had to nip in a shop to buy a mars bar for some energy. Not chuffed.

Swim: 1.03 mile (01:00:39)
Bike: 37.03 mile (03:02:06)
Run: 17.88 mile (03:02:00)

Total Distance: 55.94 miles
Total Time: 07:05:05

Week 4

Worked the Monday, did no exercise.

Tuesday I walked up to the bus stop (planning on an hour run after work) but instead of being normal my body decided to throw up. Horrible. There was an old woman at the bus stop who started rubbing my back and told me I should go back home, and if a random fairy godmother gives you advice at a bus stop, you listen. Called in sick.

Wednesday, called in again.

Thursday I went back to work (6-6) but still felt off. 30 min run after work.

Friday, sickness strikes back and stays through Saturday.

Sunday was a day off and a day of feeling quite good so went to the gym in the evening and did an hour on the bike and then a 15 min run.

Swim: None
Bike: 17.2 mile (01:00:00)
Run: 4.35 mile (00:43:20)

Total Distance: 21.55 miles
Total Time: 01:45:20

Week 5

Through the night it had snowed and snowed quite a lot. Wanted to get out riding on the road but settled for the gym. 45 min ride (13 miles) then a mile swim. Felt good after the previous week.

Tuesday was a rest day due to a family party so had beer instead of exercise. I regret nothing.

Weds was another 6-6 shift and the snow came down all day. I’d planned an hour run after work, however, and wouldn’t be beaten by the weather. I think a cleaner at work summed it up best when she saw me in my running kit, signing out of work when she said “Are you f**king stupid?!”

Chuffing hell it was cold. Plenty of snow on the ground and plenty more falling down. Surprisingly enjoyable though, never run in the snow before. Slipped a couple of times but nothing major.

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Slow and steady all the way which meant I got a good look at the confused (concerned?) faces of people driving by. Six miles took 01:07:16. Got home to a lovely status:

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Thursday and Friday I worked 10-9 and it was still crappy weather so didn’t get anything done.

Saturday I was off, so went for a cycle outside. It was still chuffing freezing though so wrapped up warm.

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12 nice steady miles done by lunch time, including some hills.

That brings me to today. Worked, then ran home. My training plan called for an easy hour run so figured I’d get around 10k in that time. It actually ended up 10k in an hour and 19 seconds.

Swim: 0.89 mile (00:59:00)
Bike: 24.7 mile (01:58:06)
Run: 12.2 mile (02:07:35)

Total Distance: 37.79 mile
Total Time: 05:04:41

On to week 6!!

Totals Since Training Plan Started

Swim: 2.93 mile
Bike: 116.13 mile
Run: 48.78 mile

Total Distance: 167.84 mile
Total Time: 20:22:24

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Doing all this for a reason, and that reason is Ironman UK and to raise money for Scope. Any and all donations are more than appreciated, even if it’s a pound/dollar/yen/silver sickle.

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Ironman UK Training Weeks 1 and 2


In Which I Start In Week 2 Because Week 1 Was Christmas Week
And So Sod That

Week 1 of 29
(Which should be week 2 of 30, see title of post)

Following the Don Fink 30 Day Ironman Training Plan, which is based more on time and heart rate rather than distance.

Monday 29th Dec: Rest Day

Tuesday 30th Dec: I signed up to a Spin class at the gym I goto and got there a few minutes early because I’m a swot. Spin class is a high(er) intensity (than a stationary bike) stationary cycle workout. There was only 9 of us in the class so nowhere to hide from the instructor.

He had us spinning at different speeds (RPM) and alternating between sitting and standing, and changing the resistance on the bikes when ever he said. It was quite brutal and felt a bit sick at one point, but managed to keep up well enough.

Straight after the class my training plan called for a 15 min run so hopped on the treadmill and got it done. Very tired at the end.

Wednesday 31st Dec: 30 mins on a gym bike, holding 100+ RPM gave me 8 miles cycled. Afterwards I’d signed up to a ‘Boot Camp’ gym class of 45 mins.

It started with a job around the class to warm up (I was already chuffing warm!) and this was followed by 4 stations of exercises. Medicine balls, kettle bells, burpees and crunches. Each section was 4 x 20 secs of the exercise with 10 seconds to recover between each, and then moved to the next station and did 4 x 20 secs on that one, then the next then the next, then ALL of it again, then a mixture of kettle bell swings and squats.

Damn near killed me.

Thursday Jan 1st: New Years Day could’ve been New Tears Day as I was soooo achy from the day before, but had a 45min run scheduled. Took it nice and steady and saw quite a few runners out and about, a few of who nodded or smiled. The others were chuffing miserable gits.

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Friday 2nd Jan: Three mile run to the swimming pool, followed by a mile swim. Not great at swimming and still doing breast stroke so it took an hour. (30 mins for the run.) The pool was full of resolutioners, good for them!

Saturday 3rd Jan: An hour on the bike. I was tempted to go out on the road but it was chuffing freezing so plodded back up to the gym. Headphones in, music on, legs turning. The best thing about doing a long time on the bike (or treadmill) is ‘seeing off’ people that use the machine next to yours. Also, when you can see them looking at your stats. *smug*

Had to really push near the end of the hour to get up to 17 miles! (120 is the RPM, held that for about 5 mins)

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It was only when I got home that I realised I should’ve done 90 mins, not 60… Pushed quite hard though so that must kinda even out? No?

Sunday 4th Jan:Hour run. It was still cold out, ice on the pavements, so went to use the treadmills. Again, nice and steady, and did 5.6miles in the 60 mins.

Weekly Totals:
Swim: 1.01 mile
Bike: 37.2 miles
Run: 14.35 miles

Total distance: 52.56 miles
Total Time: 06:27:18

Bring on week 2!!

In Other News
Gone and signed up to this again, third year in a row!

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My Year This 2014 Which Year Is Near To Over


In Which I Do A Brief Year Review

🎶It’s here, it’s here, it’s the end of the year! 🎶

(There’s emojis in that, so if you can’t see them then that’s why. Because: emoji)

WordPress has emailed me a Year In Blogging Review email but it seems to lack warmth, lack heart and lack love. So I’ve taken the bits I’ve deemed important enough and added more stuff that I like.

(The pic-texts are from WordPress, the texts from me.)

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Also, recently, I hit over 100’000 blog views. And 3’600 subscribers. I’m working on how to get you all to do my bidding.

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I didn’t even know there WERE that many countries! Doubt I could name that many anyway!

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Can’t believe I wasn’t following any of you kids… I am now. (Internetly, not stalkerly!)

That’s the basics! But these are the more important facts:

1. Finished a heap more 10k runs and one more marathon (marathon total is now 3).

2. Knocked a massive 21 minutes off my marathon PB, bringing it down to a more respectable 04:27:30.

3. Entered, and finished, my first ever (short course) triathlon in Skipton.

4. Visited New York with my lovely wife Sarah and brought her home, along with this:

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5. Wore above hoodie out in public, didn’t get ridiculed.

6. Entered IMUK / Ironman UK for July 2015 and started training, and realised spin classes and Boot Camp classes chuffing hurt! My sponsorship page can be found here: FUNDRAISING Continue reading

100th Post And A BIG Announcement


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In Which I Update You With What’s Been Happening, And With What’s Going To Happen..!

*Stands Up*
“My names Marc Hemingway and for the past few weeks, I’ve been lazy.”
*Cat looks at me funny so I sit back down*

Me and Sarah went to New York in November and had a lovely time. We had five days and four nights of busyness and sightseeing and eating and it was great.

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We did all the sights, Empire State Building (see above pic, view from it), Statue Of Liberty, Rockefeller, Central Park and everything in between. Also had a bit of a go on the subway!

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(I won’t force you to see all the pics because this isn’t a travel blog, but if you want to they’re on my Instagram: Zepalm )

I was, as you’re thinking, signed up to a 10k run in Central Park while we were there. I recorded a DNS. (Did Not Start.) That’s because:
1. We were staying further from New York than we thought and so travel time was around an hour to an hour and a half, and:
2. It was CHUFFING FREEZING! Like minus 4 freezing! Plus wind chill brought it down a few more points so nope.

Anyway, since we’ve got home I’ve done very little in the way of exercise, if any! Any what with it being Christmas and everything I’ve over eaten and over drunken and over overed and have put a fair bit of weight back on which isn’t good!

So how do I get motivated? By entering this:

IRONMAN UK 2015

And here’s the proof:

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2.4 mile swim
112 mile cycle
26.2 mile run

One after the other, no breaks, 17 hour time limit. (………oh shit!)

Training is 5/6 days a week with an average of 12-15hrs per week. Plenty to be getting on with!

My original plan was Ironman Lanzarote but I’m still not a great swimmer (only having learned how to swim last year) and Ironman UK is swum in a reservoir where as Lanza is in the sea. Plus, IMUK is a LOT closer to home!

Another factor is that Ironman Lanzarote is £380 entry but for IMUK I can (and have!) enter through a charity called Scope so it cost me £50, so long as I raise a minimum of £1000.

(Want to be the first to sponsor me? :)
http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/fundraiser-web/fundraiser/showFundraiserPage.action?userUrl=MarcHemingway&pageUrl=2 )

So there you go! That’s what I’ve been up to and that’s what I’m aiming for.

Can’t chuffing wait!

In Other News
Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!
I wasn’t allowed this:

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Maybe next year!

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York Yorkshire Marathon Recap 12th October 2014


In Which I Am Forgetful And Wet, But Am Light On My Feet, Which Get A Bit Bloody

Myself and Sarah were booked into (one of) the Premier Inn(s) in York for the night before the marathon so we’d have an easier morning on the morning if the marathon. Also, we’d get a night in York which is always good!

We got checked in and set off into York for a bit of shopping and some tea. Walking from the hotel and down Micklegate, it started to rain. Sarah looked at me and said ‘why aren’t you wearing your coat?’ So I said I’d forgotten it.
‘It was on the table when we were leaving.’
‘Yeah I know, I forgot it.’
‘You didn’t bring it.’
‘No, I forgot it.’
*Sarah sighs, looking at me in jeans and a T-shirt, with no coat.*
Luckily, I had a plan!
‘Lets find a charity shop and I’ll buy a coat!’
*Sarah sighs.*
(For anyone not in the know, charity shops sell donated goods that have been worn to death. But hopefully not worn in the act of death-ing…)
Few minutes later, I was in amongst the mothballs trying on coats. Well, I tried one on and decided that was the one for me. £6.99. Bargain.

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We got into York and bought some Chilli Jam from the Chilli Jam Man, Sarah bought some posh soap from Lush and we spent about £25 in the American sweet shop. (Americans: if you ever visit England bring a suitcase full of sweets/candy. You’ll make a killing. Hopefully not LITERALLY a killing, but I suppose you could then donate the death clothes to a charity shop?)

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Pizza Express for tea (carbs) and then back to the hotel for an early night.

Marathon Day
I’d slept quite well, considering I felt nervous. Sarah didn’t sleep so well because she said around 2am some people were going up and down the hallway shouting they were the ‘cabin police’ (?) and that she could hear the guy in the next room snoring, but maybe he was a chainsaw or something. That doesn’t even make sense…

We’d booked onto a bus from the train station to York University, where the marathon began. Chuffing heck it was cold and foggy! (Coggy?)

It was about a ten minute walk to the start part, and when we got near we got inside the expo centre to get warm. I went to the toilet. (At the designated toilets, not just in the middle of the expo centre.) Came back and had a small breakfast bar. Then I saw Stacy that I know from work so had a bit of a chat with her and wished each other luck.

On the way to the start line I queued up for the portaloos again and had to wait longer this time because obviously other had had the same idea. I was stuck near a right chuffing moron. He kept sighing and saying things like ‘what’s the hold up’ and ‘I’m going to be late for the start’, but as soon as someone was coming out of a portaloo he was saying, LOUDLY, “go go go, there’s one free.” EVERY. CHUFFING. TIME.

So close to saying to him how annoying I found him, but decided against it. I just don’t understand why people like that think that their needs and their race is more important than everyone else’s. Unless you’re a guest of honour or
The Celebrity of the race or something, just wait your chuffing turn like all the other 6’999 people do. Or go piss yourself. Either way, don’t be a dick.

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It was chuffing foggy, but there was a lovely atmosphere. Everyone looked nervous, but happily so. I looked like this: (red top, not the angry looking hi-viz guy on the left)

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Over at the side, Sarah looked like this: (blue scarf)

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Then, go time!

Set the nike+ on my phone going and my tomtom watch got going too, and then after 20 metres or so an energy gel got going out of my race belt and onto the floor where it got left. I took the other one out of the loop and held onto it for when I needed it.

Ran from York University into York, ran by a shop that sells good quality coats for £6.99 and around the beautiful York Minster. There was, it seemed, a lot of people cheering at me. I figured it was because I was wearing my HemingwayRun running top but then realised I was being a chuffing moron so had a look around, and noticed I was running right next to Tony Audenshaw who plays Bob Hope on Emmerdale, so I said hello and he said hi, and I couldn’t for the life of me remember his real name, could only think ‘Bob’ so didn’t try carry on the conversation. (Fact: Bob has the world record for the fastest ever marathon, dressed as a baby.)

Mile 3: I heard someone shout my name and saw Ironman Rob at the side of the road, which was a nice boost.

Mile 5: Someone tapped me on my shoulder and said my name, and it was Angela from Twitter (@ilovelivingwell) who had only just done the Berlin marathon like two weeks before and got into this one through a competition! (Yeah, here’s your prize: a 26 mile run! Yay!)

Mile 6: Toilet stop. Same place as last year.

10k Time: 56:53

Mile Unknown: Ran by the same church as last year somewhere between mile 6-10 (I think) but the female vicar from 2013 wasn’t there. There was, however, an equally jubilant male vicar jumping up and down and shouting ‘KEEP THE FAITH!’

Mile 10: Saw Mr Burton from the show Educating Yorkshire. Should’ve asked if he taught P.E. (Gym) but didn’t really think of that til a after I’d finished.

Mile 12: Not counting the toilet stop, furthest I’d ever run without walking. Started negging out a bit (To Neg Out: To let negative thoughts get to you) so decided as soon as I got to the 1/2 marathon marker, I’d get my music on.

Mile 13.1: Got my music on. Oddly enough, the vicars advice came back to me. My iPod has around 20’000 songs on it, and I put it on shuffle. The VERY FIRST SONG was Bon Jovi singing Keep The Faith…

1/2 Marathon Time: 2:02:34

Mile 18: Saw Rachael from Twitter in pretty much the EXACT same place as last year! Will probably look out for her next year too.

30k Time: 3:01:10

Mile 20: Ugh. This is where the struggle started and the ‘telling myself off for not running longer than 13miles in training’ kicked in. (Authors note: only ran 13milea once in training, 2nd longest was 10 miles.) Last 10k though, so zipped up my man suit and got on with it.

Mile 22: The sun came out and it got chuffing warm.

Mile 25: Text Sarah saying ’15 mins.’

40k Time: 4:13:06

Mile 26: Ahhhhh, that hill. Forgot about that hill. Sod the hill, I thought, I’ve run steeper, so ran up the chuffing hill. Walked a bit halfway up but then got running again. 400 yards. 300 yards. 200.

100 Yards: Heard someone shout my name from the sidelines (Sarah) but was concentrating too much on my time.

Mile 26.2: Done. Finished. Over. A new PB of 4:27:30, knocking 21 MINUTES off last years time! Absolutely chuffed!!

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We got the coach back to the train station and Sarah said she’d walk up to the hotel (5mins walk) for our suitcase so I could have a sit down in the station pub. Getting towards the pub door, almost tasting the beer, I realised I had no money on me.

Bugger. (Turns out Sarah realised too and came back to find me, but I’d gone to find a bench so missed each other. I was only waiting ten minutes anyway.)

(The bench I sat on had a sign on saying it was a priority bench for elderly or disabled people, and I decided I more than qualified for the latter.)

We’d left the car at Ironman Tonys house but they’d set off on holiday a few hours before we arrived so let ourselves in to collect Lily (our cat, that had stayed there the night) and got into our car.

Which wouldn’t start.

Tried family, but no one was answering so tried Sean (Captain Cheesestring) who I work with and he picked us up. Seemed a bit confused that we had a cat with us.

Arrived home (finally) and got my running shoes off.

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Ugh. Was only a little cut though. Had a shower, then had this:

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And a few beers too! Why not, seeing as though I now introduce myself as ‘Triathlete and 3 times marathon finisher.’

Next Event
Ready…? Save The Elephants 10k run on 22nd November in Central Park in NEW YORK!!! CHUFFING NEW YORK!!!

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How Far Is Your Marathon?


In Which I Tell You That It’s A Fixed Distance, 26.2 Miles

You could stop reading now, I guess. I’ve answered the question. Or you could read the explanation? S’up to you really.

Earlier this week, this came up on my Facebook newsfeed:

WWE legend The Undertaker Runs A Marathon!

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I was impressed! I’ve been a wrestling fan all my life and always liked The Undertaker. He’s not been on tv since Wrestlemania 30 back in April, so obviously is keeping fit by running.

Wanted to find out how fast he did it so read a few more websites, and it turns out The Undertaker and his wife (former WWE Diva Michelle McCool) ran the marathon for charity:

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Confirms it! He ran a chuffing marathon!

Another site, however, said this:

“The Undertaker and his wife, former WWE Diva Michelle McCool took part in the CC4C Micro Marathon 4 Inspiration over the weekend. The event is a 2.62 mile family fun run.”

Wait, what?

MICRO marathon? 2.62miles?? The other sites didn’t mention that bit! I’m in no way taking anything away from a (almost) 7 foot, (almost) 300 pound (almost) 50 year old wrestler running any distance for charity, but why is it reported as a marathon?

A marathon is a fixed distance. It’s set as a specific measurement. 26.2 miles, or 42km. That’s it. The third site had it right, calling it a micro marathon, but you can’t really have the headline missing out the ‘micro’ bit.

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I’m sure before I started running I knew how far a marathon was. I thought it was a common knowledge kinda thing, but I’m not sure that it is. I have a few people at work asking me what my next race is, so I say “York Marathon” and they say either “how far’s that?” Or my favourite “is that a 10k?”

No!! It’s a chuffing MARATHON!

I was talking to someone once who told me they’ve run LOADS of marathons, with a PB of 32 minutes. (Yep, ‘marathon’ = 5km.)

So here you go, a quick guide to the most common races:

*Ultra Marathon: Anything over a normal marathon distance. 30miles, 50km, 50miles etc.
*Marathon: 42km or 26.2 miles
*Half-marathon: 21km or 13.1 miles
*15K: 9.3 miles
*10K: 6.2 miles
*5K: 3.1 miles
*Micro Marathon: 4.2km or 2.62 miles

Each is as important as the last to each separate runner. They should all be respected equally as races, but call them by their right names!

And now you know.

(If you’re The Undertaker, and stumbled upon this by mistake when looking to read about your run, please don’t get mad and decide to come Tombstone me. Thanks.)

Next Race:
York Marathon – 12th October!!

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Two Years On


In Which I Compare Stats And Stuff

Last week was the Great North Run (I didn’t do it. See my Great North Run post from two years ago for reasons why.) That means it’s two years since I ran the Great North Run (but I kinda just said that) and that was my first ever 1/2 marathon. It took me 2h 38mins.

A few days before the run (last weeks, not two years ago. Keep up) I decided to go out and run a half marathon around where I live. (Around the area where I live, not laps of my house or anything. That’d make me chuffing dizzy and the neighbours would prolly get annoyed, as we live in a semi-detached.)

I mapped out (what I thought was) a loop of 10k (6.2miles) figuring I’d do it twice and then just add a bit on at the end.

I set off from home, up the hill to the roundabout (thanks to all the Americans that gave me roundabout info a post or two back) and then ran towards Eccleshill where I turned left down Harrogate road and had a nice long downhill stretch before turning left onto Leeds rd and then started the uphill section of around 3.5km.

I had a gel around 7km to keep my energy up and felt good as I ended the first loop. Didn’t feel as good when I saw it measured 9km, not 10. Ah well.

Carried on, did the same lap again but a bit slower and with heavier legs. Had another gel at 14km. Uphill bit, got to the top of my road where I’d planned to just have a kilometre left to run but it turned out I had 3. Stupid map measuring app…

Ah well, carry on and get it done. Which I did.

New half marathon (13.1miles, 21km) PB and the first time I’d ever gotten under 2 hours:

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An improvement of 41 mins in two years. Chuffing chuffed with that!!

In Other Similar News

4 weeks tomorrow until York Marathon and this arrived:

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Unfortunately so did a pain in my shoulder and neck, feels like I’ve pulled a muscle while sleeping. Not run in a few days because of it, so it needs to hurry up and chuffing piss off!

Good luck to everyone at Ironman Wales tomorrow! Remember: Don’t Be Shit!

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