York Yorkshire Marathon Recap 12th October 2014


In Which I Am Forgetful And Wet, But Am Light On My Feet, Which Get A Bit Bloody

Myself and Sarah were booked into (one of) the Premier Inn(s) in York for the night before the marathon so we’d have an easier morning on the morning if the marathon. Also, we’d get a night in York which is always good!

We got checked in and set off into York for a bit of shopping and some tea. Walking from the hotel and down Micklegate, it started to rain. Sarah looked at me and said ‘why aren’t you wearing your coat?’ So I said I’d forgotten it.
‘It was on the table when we were leaving.’
‘Yeah I know, I forgot it.’
‘You didn’t bring it.’
‘No, I forgot it.’
*Sarah sighs, looking at me in jeans and a T-shirt, with no coat.*
Luckily, I had a plan!
‘Lets find a charity shop and I’ll buy a coat!’
*Sarah sighs.*
(For anyone not in the know, charity shops sell donated goods that have been worn to death. But hopefully not worn in the act of death-ing…)
Few minutes later, I was in amongst the mothballs trying on coats. Well, I tried one on and decided that was the one for me. £6.99. Bargain.

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We got into York and bought some Chilli Jam from the Chilli Jam Man, Sarah bought some posh soap from Lush and we spent about £25 in the American sweet shop. (Americans: if you ever visit England bring a suitcase full of sweets/candy. You’ll make a killing. Hopefully not LITERALLY a killing, but I suppose you could then donate the death clothes to a charity shop?)

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Pizza Express for tea (carbs) and then back to the hotel for an early night.

Marathon Day
I’d slept quite well, considering I felt nervous. Sarah didn’t sleep so well because she said around 2am some people were going up and down the hallway shouting they were the ‘cabin police’ (?) and that she could hear the guy in the next room snoring, but maybe he was a chainsaw or something. That doesn’t even make sense…

We’d booked onto a bus from the train station to York University, where the marathon began. Chuffing heck it was cold and foggy! (Coggy?)

It was about a ten minute walk to the start part, and when we got near we got inside the expo centre to get warm. I went to the toilet. (At the designated toilets, not just in the middle of the expo centre.) Came back and had a small breakfast bar. Then I saw Stacy that I know from work so had a bit of a chat with her and wished each other luck.

On the way to the start line I queued up for the portaloos again and had to wait longer this time because obviously other had had the same idea. I was stuck near a right chuffing moron. He kept sighing and saying things like ‘what’s the hold up’ and ‘I’m going to be late for the start’, but as soon as someone was coming out of a portaloo he was saying, LOUDLY, “go go go, there’s one free.” EVERY. CHUFFING. TIME.

So close to saying to him how annoying I found him, but decided against it. I just don’t understand why people like that think that their needs and their race is more important than everyone else’s. Unless you’re a guest of honour or
The Celebrity of the race or something, just wait your chuffing turn like all the other 6’999 people do. Or go piss yourself. Either way, don’t be a dick.

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It was chuffing foggy, but there was a lovely atmosphere. Everyone looked nervous, but happily so. I looked like this: (red top, not the angry looking hi-viz guy on the left)

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Over at the side, Sarah looked like this: (blue scarf)

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Then, go time!

Set the nike+ on my phone going and my tomtom watch got going too, and then after 20 metres or so an energy gel got going out of my race belt and onto the floor where it got left. I took the other one out of the loop and held onto it for when I needed it.

Ran from York University into York, ran by a shop that sells good quality coats for £6.99 and around the beautiful York Minster. There was, it seemed, a lot of people cheering at me. I figured it was because I was wearing my HemingwayRun running top but then realised I was being a chuffing moron so had a look around, and noticed I was running right next to Tony Audenshaw who plays Bob Hope on Emmerdale, so I said hello and he said hi, and I couldn’t for the life of me remember his real name, could only think ‘Bob’ so didn’t try carry on the conversation. (Fact: Bob has the world record for the fastest ever marathon, dressed as a baby.)

Mile 3: I heard someone shout my name and saw Ironman Rob at the side of the road, which was a nice boost.

Mile 5: Someone tapped me on my shoulder and said my name, and it was Angela from Twitter (@ilovelivingwell) who had only just done the Berlin marathon like two weeks before and got into this one through a competition! (Yeah, here’s your prize: a 26 mile run! Yay!)

Mile 6: Toilet stop. Same place as last year.

10k Time: 56:53

Mile Unknown: Ran by the same church as last year somewhere between mile 6-10 (I think) but the female vicar from 2013 wasn’t there. There was, however, an equally jubilant male vicar jumping up and down and shouting ‘KEEP THE FAITH!’

Mile 10: Saw Mr Burton from the show Educating Yorkshire. Should’ve asked if he taught P.E. (Gym) but didn’t really think of that til a after I’d finished.

Mile 12: Not counting the toilet stop, furthest I’d ever run without walking. Started negging out a bit (To Neg Out: To let negative thoughts get to you) so decided as soon as I got to the 1/2 marathon marker, I’d get my music on.

Mile 13.1: Got my music on. Oddly enough, the vicars advice came back to me. My iPod has around 20’000 songs on it, and I put it on shuffle. The VERY FIRST SONG was Bon Jovi singing Keep The Faith…

1/2 Marathon Time: 2:02:34

Mile 18: Saw Rachael from Twitter in pretty much the EXACT same place as last year! Will probably look out for her next year too.

30k Time: 3:01:10

Mile 20: Ugh. This is where the struggle started and the ‘telling myself off for not running longer than 13miles in training’ kicked in. (Authors note: only ran 13milea once in training, 2nd longest was 10 miles.) Last 10k though, so zipped up my man suit and got on with it.

Mile 22: The sun came out and it got chuffing warm.

Mile 25: Text Sarah saying ’15 mins.’

40k Time: 4:13:06

Mile 26: Ahhhhh, that hill. Forgot about that hill. Sod the hill, I thought, I’ve run steeper, so ran up the chuffing hill. Walked a bit halfway up but then got running again. 400 yards. 300 yards. 200.

100 Yards: Heard someone shout my name from the sidelines (Sarah) but was concentrating too much on my time.

Mile 26.2: Done. Finished. Over. A new PB of 4:27:30, knocking 21 MINUTES off last years time! Absolutely chuffed!!

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We got the coach back to the train station and Sarah said she’d walk up to the hotel (5mins walk) for our suitcase so I could have a sit down in the station pub. Getting towards the pub door, almost tasting the beer, I realised I had no money on me.

Bugger. (Turns out Sarah realised too and came back to find me, but I’d gone to find a bench so missed each other. I was only waiting ten minutes anyway.)

(The bench I sat on had a sign on saying it was a priority bench for elderly or disabled people, and I decided I more than qualified for the latter.)

We’d left the car at Ironman Tonys house but they’d set off on holiday a few hours before we arrived so let ourselves in to collect Lily (our cat, that had stayed there the night) and got into our car.

Which wouldn’t start.

Tried family, but no one was answering so tried Sean (Captain Cheesestring) who I work with and he picked us up. Seemed a bit confused that we had a cat with us.

Arrived home (finally) and got my running shoes off.

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Ugh. Was only a little cut though. Had a shower, then had this:

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And a few beers too! Why not, seeing as though I now introduce myself as ‘Triathlete and 3 times marathon finisher.’

Next Event
Ready…? Save The Elephants 10k run on 22nd November in Central Park in NEW YORK!!! CHUFFING NEW YORK!!!

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