In Which I… Am Sorry, Truly Truly Sorry
Because I’m aiming to compete in triathlons, after most of my cycles home (cycle… homes?) I’ve been putting my bike away, then getting straight out for a short run. (Technically known as ‘Brick’, cycle then run afterwards.)
A few days ago I cycled the long way home (seven miles) and set off running on a small loop around home, which measures just under two miles. What with it being January and that, it’s dark at night. The first half of the loop is uphill, so nice and steady does it, but then the second half is downhill which means I sometimes get a bit giddy and speed up.
One small section of the downhill is where the pavement narrows, but there’s a line of a half dozen houses with bushes along the road.
Which is why, in the dark, if you live in one of those house you should look both ways when leaving your garden. NOT, as happened, amble (yes, Amble!) out your garden then meander (yes, Meander!) down the hill.
The reason being, there might be a giddy runner stonking (yes, …you get it) down the hill (maybe looking a bit upwards because he might think ‘if there’s bats around I might get bit and turn into batman’ and yes I know that’s not how batman became batman but I’m not rich like batman and yes I know it’s Bruce Wayne that’s rich technically but technically SHUT UP because I KNOCKED RIGHT INTO HER!)
BAM! POW! THWACK!
Yup, right into the back of her. Obviously, she screamed very loudly (didn’t shout for batman though. Should’ve suggested it) I’d realised a split second before hitting into her, that in was about to (within a split second) hit into her, but had no chance of stopping.
I did my best though, and with my super-reactions I caught her so she didn’t go flying onto the floor or over a wall. The thing is, as my left arm went around her shoulder and stopped her projection, my right hand automatically tried to help, but her arms were in mid scream in the air, so what I’m saying is this…
I think I grabbed a boob.
(A lesser man might’ve said ‘I was left feeling a right tit’, but I’m above such things.)
Which leaves the moral of the story to be this:
Not everyone can be batman, but always shout for batman just in case a batman is near. (Or, look before you leap. Or something.)
Miles run: 45
Miles biked: 92
Got my Mad Dog 10k number through, #750. This Sunday!
Also, this week New 10k PB: 54:15!
In Other News
Lily (our kitten) has had her op this week and has taken to napping in my rucksack. Sarah thinks it’s cute, I’m reserving judgement for when I see how much cat hair gets on my running stuff.